Bumper
stickers seen around the world
- Constipated people
don't give a crap.
- Practice safe
sex, go screw yourself.
- If you drink
don't park, accidents cause people.
- Who lit the fuse
on your tampon?
- If you don't
believe in oral sex, keep your mouth shut.
- Please tell your
pants it's not polite to point.
- If that phone
was up your ass, maybe you could drive better.
- My kid got your
honor roll student pregnant.
- Thank you for
pot smoking.
- To all you virgins,
thanks for nothing.
- If at first you
don't succeed, blame someone else and seek counseling.
- Impotence Nature's
way of saying "No Hard Feelings."
- If you can read
this I've lost my trailer.
- Horn broken...watch
for finger.
- It's not how
you pick your nose, but where you put the booger.
- If you're not
a hemorrhoid, get off my ass.
- You're Just Jealous
Because The Voices Are Talking To Me.
- The earth is
full--go home.
- I have the body
of a God....Buddha.
- This would be
really funny if it weren't happening to me.
- So many pedestrians-so
little time.
- Cleverly disquised
as a responsible adult.
- If we quit voting
will they all go away?
- The face is familiar
but I can't quite remember my name.
- Eat right, exercise,
die anyway.
- Illiterate? Write
for help.
- Honk if anything
falls off.
- Cover me I'm
changing lanes.
- He who hesitates
is not only lost, but miles from the next exit.
- I refuse to have
a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
- You! Out of the
gene pool!
- I do whatever
my rice Krispies tell me to.
- Where are we
going and why am I in this handbasket?
- It's been lovely
but I have to scream now.
- I haven't lost
my mind, It's backed up on a disk somewhere.
- Seen on the back
of a biker's vest--If you can read this, the bitch
fell off.
- If sex is a pain
in the ass, then you're doing it wrong.
- Fight crime shoot
back.
- If you can read
this, please flip me back over..(seen upside down,
on a jeep).
- Remember folks
stop lights timed for 35mph are also timed for
70mph.
- Guys no shirt,
no service, gals no shirt, no charge.
- If walking is
so good for you, then why does my mailman look
like Jabba the Hut?
- Necropillia that
uncontrollable urge to crack open a cold one.
- Ax me about Ebonics.
- Body by Nautilus;
brain by Mattel.
- Boldly going
nowhere.
- Cat the other
white meat.
- Caution--Driver
legally blonde!
- Don't be sexist-broads
hate that.
- Heart attacks--Gods
revenge for eating his animal friends.
- Honk if you've
never seen an Uzi fired from a car window.
- How many roads
must a man travel down before he admits he is
lost?
- If you can't
dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with
bullets.
- Money isn't everything,
but it sure keeps the kids in touch.
- Saw it...Wanted
it...Had a fit...Got it!
- Warning! Driver
only carries $20.00 in ammunition.
- What has four
legs and an arm? A happy pit bull.
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